Whenever I hear or read of a three+ child family I automatically seek out the birthdates (when possible) and do the math (which given my skill set takes an embarassingly long time) How old was the mom when the first was born? The fourth? Cate Blanchett's oldest is about 7 years younger than her baby, so is Natasha McElhone's. I wonder how that's working for them, as if having children similarly aged makes us potentially kindred spirits.
My not so secret solution to this problem is to have a fourth. We have no financial business having a third but 4 is such a nice number. Two sets of two, optimally another boy girl pair, disgustingly symmetrical. The big kids looking after the little ones, the family dynamics perfectly balanced.
I'll be 35 by the time our anniversary comes along in July. It'll be 4 months since I miscarried which seems to be sensible spacing to try again. The previous three attempts took in one fell swoop. If all goes well I'll tell the kids in October, I couldn't bear to put them thru another pregnancy loss.
I have no idea how I would survive another...